This move has been interesting. Much different than what I expected. There was a time when Ben and I moved a lot. Before, during and after law school we moved about 10 times in five years ... Salt Lake, East Millcreek, Midvale, St. George, Oregon, back to St. George, back to Oregon, back to Salt Lake, and back to St. George, before we finally settled in Centerville. So, I thought I knew what to expect with this move. I thought it would be easy ... especially since we weren't moving far. But the funny thing is, even though this home feels right, everything else seems a little "off." The neighborhood is different, the views out my windows are different, church last Sunday was particularly rough. Where were the familiar faces? Where were my friends? It's amazing how you can be in a room, surrounded by lots and lots of people, yet feel so alone.
I know we didn't move far, I know that our wonderful friends "there" are still our wonderful friends. But it's just "different" when I don't see them drive down the street every day, when I don't see them at church every Sunday.
I knew the move in and of itself would be hard ... and it was ... completely exhausting in fact. But I didn't expect it to be as emotionally hard as it is. I kind of thought that my kids would miss their friends, but that I'd be just fine. But I was wrong. It's tough to go from feeling so supported, involved, included, to feeling somewhat detached, separated.
I know that time will change all of this. I know that I will love this ward, this neighborhood, these people, as much as I do those people I'm missing so much right now ... it will just take a little time.
Hopefully it won't take too long. I was amazed this morning, as I was reflecting on all of these thoughts and feelings, when I opened my front door and found that a new, "future" neighbor had delivered a box of cookies to our family. It helped.
Christmas letter 2019
5 years ago
Oh Brenda! I can completely relate! You described exactly, EXACTLY how I felt when we moved 3 years ago. It is SO wonderful to still be so close to the Reading Ward folks and hear about all their goings on, etc. And it took time, but now I LOVE my ward and neighbors here just as much as I did there. Because at first I thought there was just no way. As sure as I was that this is where we were supposed to be, I couldn't imagine anything being better than that Centerville neighborhood. So I feel really blessed that we seem to have struck gold twice in terms of neighbors and wards. And I'm totally sure the same will be true for you. It just takes time. It feels weird and off for awhile. But it comes.
ReplyDeleteI remember it taking over a year to feel like we were really part of this ward. It is weird how sometimes it just takes a little time. Your family is so great and will be loved wherever you are, it just might take a little time. I hope Pres and Emery keep golfing together, Pres loves going with him.
ReplyDeleteMoving is hard! You will fall in love with your new neighbor's before you know it. Until then come to our neighborhood, someone is always outside for you to stop and chat with. We would love to see you and your cute boys. Plus isn't it getting close to time when our oldest kids need to hang out again. We should plan something, like swimming or something.
ReplyDeleteBrenda,
ReplyDeleteI completely understand the being alone in a sea of people. I still feel that way sometimes and we have been here a year. I think there is a normal morning process that comes with a move. I hope things will change quickly for you.